PSA: Perfectionism Simply Abandoned

Dear Son,

I was just lying in bed dreaming of our road ahead with you and thought of another letter to write.

Your older brother knows, through experience, what I am about to say and I just want to let you in on it as well. So here's my PSA: Perfection Simply Abandoned.

Son, I love you the way you are.

Your father and I look forward to discovering and nurturing you. We know that you will view yourself through our eyes, and that comforts us, for where others see "bad," we see potential. Where others see "disobedient," we see independent. And where others experience your anger as "scary," we experience your power. We will show you how to develop your potential, independence, and power to live in harmony with other people, and to chase with vigor and accomplish your dreams.

We won't expect you to do it all, or any one thing, perfectly. We will forgive you, and we will forgive ourselves. We will show ourselves the same nurturing that we show to you. Otherwise, our efforts will be in vain.

Speaking of vain efforts, one can spend a lifetime seeking perfection and not attain it. Perfection is almost a myth. I say almost because there is a world of perfection; that world lies with God. We will not tread on His territory, so when you seek perfection, turn to God.

Some people put off living because living isn't perfect. And they put off doing because they're doing isn't perfectly. They never accomplish their dreams because they waste too much time trying (to accomplish them perfectly). I don't want that to be you. It was me; It's life in a straight jacket.

Together, your father and I will show you there is a world of difference between trying to reach an impossible standard, and living and learning as you move toward ever expanding expectations. We'll show you how to brush yourself off and get back up and how to ask for help when you need it.

Just watch your big brother play. Sometimes he'll work and work on his own to accomplish one element of his play. And other times he'll turn to me or your daddy and say, "help please." We are proud of him for knowing when to keep pushing until he succeeds and when he knows he needs a little help -- either way isn't perfect, but both ways get him what he wants.

You'll get there. And we'll show you how as we accomplish our dreams -- imperfectly.

Son, you love you as I love you -- just the way you are.

I can't wait to hold you!

Love,

Your Mother

(Perhaps of Interest: Childhood Drips: Bring Your Own Wetwipes)